Overcoming Passivity And Passive-Aggressive Behavior

The early sessions of couples therapy can have many challenges.  In highly distressed relationships, a common pattern is that each partner wants the other to change first.  The complaining partner demands massive changes, with no realization of how much is being requested.  When the targeted partner won’t answer, the therapist is caught in the middle.  Who should make the first move to break their impasse?  The person making the demands should go first by answering some questions.  For example, what does he desire from his partner?  The answers can help remove passivity or passive aggressiveness from the request, and help spot where the passivity is located.

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